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Kind of like a love letter to Illinois, if that love letter was penned by a frostbitten, sarcasm-drenched satirist who's seen too many Illinois winters.!","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Red","offer_id":49116952822053,"sku":"29508193040503568229","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":49116952854821,"sku":"21197474224436172198","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":49116952887589,"sku":"32574564915040578757","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Sport Grey","offer_id":49116952920357,"sku":"14875810090519980554","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Light Pink","offer_id":49116952953125,"sku":"13980585164175942851","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Navy","offer_id":49116952985893,"sku":"81137918508765469664","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Red","offer_id":49116953018661,"sku":"21728934416369548849","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":49116953051429,"sku":"30745283455599942423","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":49116953084197,"sku":"31058866371630597870","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Sport Grey","offer_id":49116953116965,"sku":"64370187811856940804","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Light Pink","offer_id":49116953149733,"sku":"24618470179903751309","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Navy","offer_id":49116953182501,"sku":"30795475619940275152","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Red","offer_id":49116953215269,"sku":"32741991179268065167","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":49116953248037,"sku":"49027537516601880003","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":49116953280805,"sku":"18900844751533461930","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Sport Grey","offer_id":49116953313573,"sku":"18682549195350777758","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Light Pink","offer_id":49116953346341,"sku":"32088701879584537703","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Navy","offer_id":49116953379109,"sku":"12901083152348921860","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Red","offer_id":49116953411877,"sku":"30970611374230833200","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":49116953444645,"sku":"29655862067202097022","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":49116953477413,"sku":"16048426182726227769","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Sport Grey","offer_id":49116953510181,"sku":"12348661432641841685","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Light Pink","offer_id":49116953542949,"sku":"84795173935945932805","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Navy","offer_id":49116953575717,"sku":"15387536685588528045","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Red","offer_id":49116953608485,"sku":"32508227006492403371","price":23.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":49116953641253,"sku":"33817330289046124518","price":23.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":49116953674021,"sku":"72291051159166118986","price":23.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Sport Grey","offer_id":49116953706789,"sku":"11918875759663547687","price":23.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Light Pink","offer_id":49116953739557,"sku":"27038457017072004080","price":23.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Navy","offer_id":49116953772325,"sku":"21426413169125269684","price":23.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0876\/1907\/6389\/files\/12132163106446754121_2048.jpg?v=1718282332"},{"product_id":"im-dead-in-illinois-hoodie","title":"\"I'm Dead in Illinois\" Hoodie","description":"Looking for a piece of clothing that boldly highlights the bleak reality of Illinois, and tells people you've survived the metaphorical chill of the Windy City? 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This garment does exactly that, sparing no mercy for the people who would dare brave Chi-town's winters without a thermal jacket and a teeth-gritted determination.\n\nPicture this; a shirt that just screams, \"Yup, I've braved the bone-biting cold, the cutthroat politics, and lived to tell the tale - and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.\" Of course, the 'lousy' bit is total sarcasm. We wouldn't have you looking like a tool now, would we? This piece is going to be your go-to grab from your wardrobe when you want to project a bit of pride at having survived Illinois!\n\nThis sassy little 💀Illinois wearable is thoughtfully crafted from 100% soft, breathable cotton. It's designed for those who don’t mind throwing around some cheeky humor like confetti, and can handle the occasional eye-roll from the less enlightened. The design, amazingly minimal, speaks louder than a drunk Bears fan on game day. The print stays as vibrant and chipper as a suburban mom on her third margarita, even after repeated washes. Comfortable, durable, and stylish - perfect for showcasing your borderline masochistic love for 'The Prairie State'. \n\nWhether you're wearing it as a T-shirt, long-sleeve shirt, hoodie, or sweater, you'll always be just a glance away from reminding everyone around you of your ridiculously cold yet weirdly charming homeland. Kind of like a love letter to Illinois, if that love letter was penned by a frostbitten, sarcasm-drenched satirist who's seen too many Illinois winters.!","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Dark Heather","offer_id":49116956033317,"sku":"50493344897618367226","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Navy","offer_id":49116956066085,"sku":"25052963454264020451","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Sand","offer_id":49116956131621,"sku":"21548045910399827937","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Sport Grey","offer_id":49116956164389,"sku":"71986894947569868239","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":49116956197157,"sku":"25624459735151880220","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":49116956229925,"sku":"32119304105039953846","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Dark 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You’ve got a complicated relationship with Illinois. It’s like living with a roommate who never does the dishes but somehow makes the best deep-dish pizza. It’s a paradox, that’s what it is. This I 😬 Illinois garment perfectly captures your love-hate relationship with the Land of Lincoln, the Sufjan Stevens songs, and, god help us, the Chicago weather. It’s a celebration of survival, really. “Look at me! I made it through yet another winter!” \n\nThis isn’t just clothing, it’s a frostbite trophy. Or, if you're no longer there, it’s a new way of telling people, “I got out!” Bold, clever, and not overly serious, just like you, right? Wear it any time you want to pretend you're as resilient as a deep-frozen hotdog, or simply to remember the time you actually saw the sun in February.\n\nNow, let's talk thread count, baby. Our garments are made from 100% soft, breathable cotton constructed by the picked-over, underpaid, but overjoyed cotton farmers of the United States of A. Plus, everything's printed with vibrant, durable inks, ensuring that the grimace emoji stays just as visibly awkward wash after wash, while your fond but complex memories of Illinois will never fade away. 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Plus, everything's printed with vibrant, durable inks, ensuring that the grimace emoji stays just as visibly awkward wash after wash, while your fond but complex memories of Illinois will never fade away. 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Ideal for anyone who has ever uttered, \"Because it's Illinois.\" Use this shirt to confess your mixed feelings about the state, or gift it to that out-of-state friend who always asks why you live where the air hurts your face. Either way, we get paid, you get to laugh at your own misery, and everyone wins. Except Illinois sports, they still lose. Keep crying, Illinois. 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Ideal for anyone who has ever uttered, \"Because it's Illinois.\" Use this shirt to confess your mixed feelings about the state, or gift it to that out-of-state friend who always asks why you live where the air hurts your face. Either way, we get paid, you get to laugh at your own misery, and everyone wins. Except Illinois sports, they still lose. Keep crying, Illinois. 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Ideal for anyone who has ever uttered, \"Because it's Illinois.\" Use this shirt to confess your mixed feelings about the state, or gift it to that out-of-state friend who always asks why you live where the air hurts your face. Either way, we get paid, you get to laugh at your own misery, and everyone wins. Except Illinois sports, they still lose. Keep crying, Illinois. 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